Foriegn Affairs

Exister, c'est oser se jeter dans le monde.

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Appearances

Recently, I've been reading a phenomenal book- The Great Gatsby. Although I could tell you about it, take my word- just read it. 
Anyways, this led me to the subject of appearances. In the book, all the characters, even the ones who are supposed to have a moral compass, put up a facade only they have to see past. For several of the characters, this means inventing an alternate reality, where they can take pride in accomplishments that never happened. Others have woven a web so thick of lies, sometimes even they get caught in it. 

This got me thinking about the facade that I put up. As transparent as I try to be, I know that as a human I don't want my wrinkled, old self to be the image I project. I want to be a polished, perfect version that may only exist on paper, not reality. 
I also think that others do the same thing. 
How many times has the media and the world showed us only the very best of celebrities and those of influence, neglecting the dark, unattractive side that each of us harbor? In their own way, they are painting a rosy picture that we all buy in to. 
Only by tearing down our own walls can we learn to not only love ourselves, but others. To teach equality, love, and integrity, we need to practice it ourselves.
I propose a challenge:
LOVE YOURSELF. Accept yourself for your flaws and shortcomings, and then look outside to others. As one of my favorite quotes says:





Thursday, March 24, 2016

Lucky

I think it is easy to say that March doesn't seem to be my month. Especially in the last couple of weeks, everything that I have tried out for has fallen through. Different things that I really wanted didn't work out. It was easy for me to say that I was unlucky, that the world hated me, and that I couldn't catch a break. I really felt like nothing good was going to happen to me. For every step forward I took, I was pushed back another ten steps.
However, I came to a realization that the world wasn't punishing me, but trying to teach me a lesson that I am enough. I didn't need recognition or awards or people to surround me to get my self-worth from. As I was running yesterday, I had a thought that came into my head. I was running ON MY OWN! Nobody was doing it for me. 
I believe that it is easy to think that individual worth comes from things that you are surrounded with, but that isn't the truth. I found comfort in knowing that I could do things on my own, and that even if my achievements and rewards weren't recognized, it didn't change who I was as a person. 
Sometimes, it's hard to think that you are blessed and lucky. The advice that I had to give myself this week was this- Stay Oriented. With a goal of where we want to be and want to become in the future, we can distinguish what actually matters most.
So, to all of you that feel as though you can't catch a break- you're not the only one. 



Monday, March 21, 2016

Farmhouse for a Day

Surrounded by many acres of land sits a Victorian farmhouse, whitewashed to perfection, despite being vacant. The cracks in the grey concrete foundation do not detract from the house, and provide a home for the purple honeysuckles that grow there. The sun shines on the front of the house, illuminating they broken screen door that has lost use of its rusty hinges. Somehow, all the beautiful stained glass windows are intact, creating a multicolored display on the green grass.
If you were to walk inside the house, it might seem like the owners never left. All the furniture is in place, looking like someone might be coming to visit in the near future. Although the holes in the upholstery grow bigger, the aura of sophistication is still potent. Strangely, a window is left open, a feature in this old house. On a warm breeze floats the scent of summer and joy. In the kitchen, a farmhouse sink is placed in front of a spacious window. The view is breathtaking- golden sunflowers with other flora and fauna scattered around. The intricate rug placed by the sink is threadbare and worn, as if the owners' spent more time here than anywhere else in the house. The old wooden floors creak and grown in protest to the house settling, without the company of a family to keep it company. 
Going back outside, there isn't another house in sight. Truly, this house is on the edge of a frontier. The only company it has is the green woods surrounding the house, and the fields that stretch out endlessly. 
As you walk down the gravel path, you don't understand why one would want to leave this perfect piece of the world. Unlocking your car and opening the door, you hurriedly start the engine to blast the cold AC to receive relief from the heat. Driving away, the house gets smaller and smaller, and the tall grasses that seemed to keep you company a short time ago almost seem to be waving. Melancholy, you drive away, realizing that you might not be able to ever find this house again.



Thursday, March 17, 2016

First Date

                The clock reads 6:00, the time that she agreed to meet him at a local restaurant. However, she is running late, smoothing light brown hairs that don’t seem to stay in place. Glancing down at her outfit in the smudged bathroom mirror, she wonders if the strategic pick of her favorite dress was the right call. Knowing that is it is too late to change even if she wanted to, she grabs her purse. As she comes out of the bathroom, her brother reminds her to not forget that she had plans tonight, as if she could forget. Grabbing the keys from the hook, she rushes out the door, shouting good-byes and hearing good lucks follow her out the door.
                In the car, she can’t seem to find the right music. None of the songs are right. They are either to edgy or cliché or slow. Barely paying attention to the road, a car honks as the ruby red of the stoplight turns to emerald green against the night sky. Thoughts of backing out or not being good enough run through her mind. She punches the gas, knowing that she is now passing the time of being fashionably late to being rude. Wishing that there was a dater’s handbook or other step-by- step guide was available to first timers, she parks the car and turns off the engine. Freaking out, she sends a quick text to her friends, asking for last minute advice and comforting wishes. She is greeted with a text from him instead of them.
I parked! Let me know when you get here.
Those words scare her so much. Gathering what little courage she has, she gives herself one last look in the small visor mirror. Brown eyes with mascara and a flushed face look back at her. She pushes the door open and walks up to the restaurant. She doesn’t see him at first, and she wonders if she is doing the right thing.

As soon as she thinks this, she spots him. He turns around, and smiles.